Roads Open
For a long while you stare out at the ocean, Bragho behind you not even daring to breathe. The sun gleams on the rough gray stone worn by a million padded footpaws. The choice before you wrenches you to the bone, but at the same time, you feel for the rugged fox-man as well, who's worked so hard to make you welcome and take you out for a nice day. You'd feel like a right ass to ruin it right here, even if he didn't make you... feel wanted.
"I'd... like to see the whales," you finally say.
Your nose picks up the change in Bragho's mood almost immediately, and you turn around to find him smiling a rare open smile, ears perked. "Hey! That's... that's great! The rental shop is right down there, near the pier. I'll go get tickets for a boat."
"Bragho..." You say.
"Best put your ribbons and stuff back into the bag with this thing-" he stuffs the costume into the shopping bag. "-So it doesn't get wet. They've been known to splash. Did you get a hat? I didn't see you get a hat. I'll get you a hat."
"Bragho, I..."
"All right. Stay here for just a moment. Order... two Spiced Teas. They're a must-try. I'll be right back!" In a rush, he exits the cafe, leaving the shopping bag sitting in the sun in his seat. A tuft of griffon-costume fur pokes out unceremoniously.
"... I didn't decide if I was going to stay or not yet..." you finally finish.
***
"You can sail, too?" You inquire of the fox-man, stepping onto the burnished deck of a small sailboat. The water below you is blue and clear, the air smelling of salt and oiled rope. Other ships leisurely pull into and out of the docks, some sailboats like yours, with other fox couples. WAIT! Hold on! You two aren't a couple! Right? Right?!
"Sure can," Bragho replies, interrupting your continuing identity crisis. "This one time I ended up as this buffalo thing- that's an animal like our Northridge cattle- who also happened to be a pirate. It was not fun explaining to the other crewmembers why I suddenly forgot everything about sailing a ship."
You giggle as you pull out of port. The sail goes wonderfully... far too wonderfully. The weather's perfect, Bragho's stories are interesting and often hilarious. You see a bunch of whales, and some come up close and spray you and Bragho, causing you both to yell in surprise and then laugh as you drip-dry in the sun.
From there things accelerate; a portable cafe lunch on the pier, sightseeing from the top of the skyscraper (you feel like you're floating in a cloud), and a late afternoon play (a fairly amusing comedy about fox-fairies in some wood playing tricks on fleeing lovers. Feels familiar at parts.) You spend the whole play in Bragho's arms, feeling safe and secure for the first time since you woke up in that wretched hall of costumes.
It's only after the play when you catch Bragho eying a poster for a nice restaurant downtown that you finally realize things are beginning to spiral out of your control (and that's bad... isn't it?). You excuse yourself for a moment to freshen up, and soon are leaning over a sink, ears flat, breathing steadily, still feeling loopy from his scent and presence.
"This is getting out of hand... right? I don't know..." you say to yourself. You look in the mirror, seeing a pretty fox girl, then you the fox, then a fox girl, then you the fox. "What am I? What did the wizard do to me?!" You shake your head violently, your hair whipping about. "No, what did I do to myself... and what am I doing to him..."
You make an excuse to go home. You make it convincing; after all, you are the rising starlet Lenara, you tell yourself bitterly. The bus ride is a long soft eclair of wonderful contentment iced with guilt. It's clear from the way Bragho carries himself that a huge weight has been lifted from his shoulders. You think you've given him a false impression, that he thinks you meant more in agreeing to go with him than you intended. But... you just can't tell him otherwise now. Not now. There's no reason to ruin this moment.
Right?
***
The hilltop hasn't changed much. A few flowers have sprouted, but the emerald grass, the trees made alive by the orange sherbet sunset, and the quiet village below, they're all the same.
You shudder, remembering those first moments. Yet, it felt right to start here, somehow.
"I don't even know why I'm here anymore. Do I want to find them? Should I? God damn it! GOD DAMN IT!" you sob, collapsing onto a large stump. You seem to be alone, back where it all began. You try to think of how to search, and where to search.
Or if you're even going to search at all.
Written by Mr.Peaches on 29 June 2010
